Normally, I try not to lie to myself. It’s fairly easy, when you have a chronic disease like Diabetes, to only see bad things. You hope there will be a cure (but you’re pretty skeptical). There’s new technology out that’s going to change your life (but it’s probably expensive and difficult to use and maybe even hurts). It’s just one bad day (or week or month or year or decade) and things will get better. It’s good to be optimistic, and hope is necessary, but I will not lie to myself.
Today, there is no cure for the disease I’ve had for almost two decades.
And that, is that.
There are, however, other things that add more value to my life than Diabetes will ever take from it. It may surprise some people to know that being Diabetic actually helps to highlight what I am most grateful for in my life. For most negatives, there are positives that juxtapose them.
I have a disease that is often incorrectly portrayed in public forums and not easily understood by many, including those that have been diagnosed. I also have family and friends that ask questions (and read articles and come to appointments) to make themselves more knowledgeable in order to be more helpful and supportive. They do not exclude me from their lives based on a disease that is unpredictable and difficult to manage.
There is never a time I am unaware of my condition, or that I can escape from the diligence it demands. My family and friends have made efforts, small and large, throughout my life to let me know that they are willing to help. My parents cared for every aspect of me before I was able to care for myself – continually teaching me how best to take care of my health by example. My friends stash emergency juice and supplies in their fridges and cars so that they can always be ready to help, and come out to walks to band together in support.
My people do not ever leave me alone. They’re constantly checking in and asking how I’m doing, how are my numbers, am I forgetting anything before we leave for a trip, do I have one extra vial of insulin or two? It could be annoying, and it is sometimes frustrating because I’m not always on top of everything, but it’s also comforting. I will never be carrying the burden of being chronically ill alone and that is bigger than the fact that I am chronically ill.
My people, as I call them with all of the love and respect and gratefulness a group of people willing to smother me in love deserve, are the best damn thing ever.
And that, is that.